I’m writing this on Wednesday morning. May 25, 2022. By the time most of you read this, we’ll be on to other things. But this morning, I cannot stop thinking of the parents who sent their kids to school yesterday and that was it. They will never see them again. They are gone. Did they walk them to the bus? Drop them off in front of the building that is now all over the news? What was their morning like? What was their last breakfast together? Is their last image of their child running down the sidewalk with their backpack swaying? Was their hair a mess? Was their homework finished? Were they wearing a Ninja Turtle shirt? 

Stay in Your Lane, Debi

I don’t usually write about things like this. My excuse is that I need to stay in my lane. Be positive. Find the joy. But not today. This is too big. I cannot find joy. 

I watched too much news last night, but I just couldn’t turn away. I kept hoping for an explanation. A motive. An answer. Or was I hoping for an explanatory detail that would help me feel safe in my own neighborhood? But does it have to be our community? Our child? Our teachers? Our grandmothers before we’re not afraid to say something? Write something? Do something? 

I do not write about politics. Not because I don’t hold strong beliefs, but because I’m afraid. Afraid I don’t know enough and I’ll get it wrong. Afraid I don’t understand the history well enough to speak/write intelligently. Afraid I’ll piss someone off. Embarrass myself. Offend. Lose friends and followers. Heck, lose relationships with family members. 

But this is not a political issue. It’s really not. It’s a loss issue. Loss of children and teachers in schools and grandmothers in grocery stores and on and on and on and on. 

Not a political issue, other than the fact that there are proven things politicians could do to help. Most other countries don’t have this problem. We’ve had times ourselves when it wasn’t this bad. But politicians are afraid. Afraid they’ll piss somebody off. Lose friends and followers. Lose contributors. Lose their jobs. Lose their power. They are afraid. 

On Truth

Recently, one of my kids was struggling with a decision and I said, “Don’t be afraid of the truth.” 

I’m not afraid of the truth this morning. I don’t pretend to know the answers. I don’t know what legislation we need to pass to be the biggest help, the quickest. I didn’t even know until yesterday that when our constitution was written, there were no bullets. Yeah. Fifty-nine years after the second amendment was written, bullets were invented for guns. I can’t stop thinking about that.

The best I have to offer is a quotation from an incredible woman who did know answers. Lots of them. And she wasn’t afraid to write the truth.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” ~Maya Angelou

This I do know. We are a nation wracked with hate and violence. We profess to be a Christian nation, but we do not even protect our most innocent. We’ve lost our grip regarding “truth.” We pick on each other in the most mean-spirited manner. Jesus would puke.

We know better. We have to do better. I have to do better.