I am writing to report a hijacking of the heart. Mine. I was warned about this, but there was no way. It’s the ultimate “you had to be there.” I was pretty sure my son didn’t understand how 6 lb. 13 oz. of precious would commandeer his life–how could he? But I was seriously unaware of Nana-ness.
The Stages of becoming a Nana:
- Denial–you will not behave like your granny-crazy friends. You will not replace your ocean waves home screen background with a baby photo.
- The Meeting–You smell her skin for the first time. You take in her face. You fight tears. You experience amazement.
- The Second meeting–You walk into the hospital and realize how slowly the elevator raises to the second floor. You recognize her perfect face and fingers as something you love. Familiar. New.
- The Hearing–You hear her squeak for the first time. She’s in there!
- The Seeing–You hold her and the rest of the room fades away. You talk to her and she makes eye contact. You’re a goner.
- The Bonding–You spend the next week noticing every stretch of her body, celebrating her homecoming and when she nurses well, pees or poops. You eagerly volunteer to hold her.
- The Panic–Southwest Airlines is about to put 1711 miles between you. You can’t imagine how these two kids (her parents) will fare without you.
- The Whisper–You assure her Nana will be back in 41 days and it’s gonna be alright.
- The Dream–You have sleeping dreams about cuddling her or that she is sleeping in a shoe box beside your face; you revel in the connection. You have day dreams about taking her to the library and the park and the beach. Letting her make a mess in your kitchen. Just sitting and chatting with her. Being buddies. Accumulating airline miles.
- The Sighing–You apologize to your dearly departed parents for all the mistakes you made raising their grandchildren.
- The Reality–You admit your son is the exact, same age you were when you brought him home from the hospital and that he and your daughter-in-law will be wonderful parents. You pull out of a fog and realize you have the same wonderful life you had ten days ago, and the best example you can set for everyone you love, including the baby hijacker, is to live it to the fullest. You change your home screen background photo.
- The Counting–You secretly count the days till she’s locking eyes with you again.
- The Praying–That your son-daddy only remembers the fun, creative parenting you modeled for him. That God will watch over him and his precious family. For their highest good. And then you trust and say Amen.
The Stages of becoming a Nana.